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Writer's Block: Out of fashion

2010-03-16T15:30:45Z

If you could choose which fashions would go out of style permanently, what would you choose, and why?

Pajamas as daily clothing. Make an effort and get dressed, dammit!

The Lady of the Beasts

2009-11-06T16:41:09Z

Setting: The Circle. Full Moon, in the November chill, just past the change of the clocks back from daylight savings time.

Cast (earthly): Me and a very strong sense and knowledge of all the small critters around me, in den, burrow and nest.

Action: The Moon rituals are a blend of set ritual words and actions that bracket and set the space for inspired (or improvised) events. While admitting to my very human mindset, I try hard to clear myself of pre-conceived issues or subjects to "work on" before I go out for this ritual. When this works, it is amazing. When it doesn't work, I console myself with the thought that the next ritual is 2 weeks away and I will be able to try again.

(Last night was cold and I bundled myself in many layers. I fear being cold far more than I fear being over warm. But working with candles and incense, I could not wear gloves. Somehow, I was not aware of my hands being cold until the very end, as I was putting the candles out. I suspect that through constant use the tree circle itself has become a powerful gateway between worlds.)

I lit the candles in the quarters, and drew the circle, greeting the spirits that dwell in each quarter as I came to them. Mostly the words are ritualized, but sometimes phrases slip in that I don't expect. I try hard to remember them for later. Incense is lit. I state my existence and my Greeting. On nights such as last night, the sense of being Elsewhere is very strong, even as I can look around and see my trees, hear my neighbors pond and fountain, see the outlines of the houses (and the always on porchlights of the neighbor across the street-at least always on when I am in the circle). This is when I feel that I am at the very spindle of all of creation. This is when, should it happen at all, Inspiration comes.

The words last night were for the small predators, the foxes, the bobcats, the small snakes (yes, I've been dreaming of them again) and small raptors. The large predators (man, bear, coyote, and occasional cougar) have their watchers, and the prey have the numbers. There was power, and strength flowing in the message, flowing through me, but toward what end?

I've no idea how long I stood arms upraised, before sweeping them in full circle, first one way, then the other (a motion that had not been part of any previous ritual), it felt like years, it felt like seconds. But since the stick of incense that had been lit last was just beginning to burn out, it could not have been more than 20 minutes. But with the sweeping motion, the Message was finished, and it was time to return to the "script."

It wasn't until I had returned, stepped through the gates and started putting out the candles that I realized that there was now frost on the grass and just how cold my hands were. The Cross Quarter won't be until this coming weekend, but winter is approaching.

The Fucking Brussel Sprouts-for Kel

2009-10-28T22:30:45Z

The Original recipe was restaurant sized, this is my cut down to private home proportions

1 LB Brussel Sprouts
1/2 LB bacon
4 Shallots, finely julienne's (cut up really small works, too)
1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil
1/2 tablespoon chopped parsley
kosher salt, black pepper, to taste

1. cut off the very bottom of the sprouts and make an X on the bottom so the water will get inside and blanche it.

2. bring a pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Add the sprouts, and cook until barely done.

3. shock the sprouts in ice cold water and cool quickly

4. drain, and cut in half, from bow to stern.

5. in a saute pan, heat the oil to nearly smoking and add the bacon, rendering it until crispy. Drain off some of the oil, but save (you may want to add some of it back). Toss the shallots into the hot oil and bacon, when the shallots just start to color, add the drained brussel sprouts. When hot (and it takes a very little amount of time!) put in serving dish, season with salt and pepper and sprinkle with parsley.

Note: This may sound a little complicated, but only because of the way it is written out. You really could cook the sprouts earlier in the day and just do the bacon part right before eating.

Next up (whenever that might be): the story of how the recipe got its name.

Writer's Block: Yes, offense taken

2009-10-26T02:15:05Z

If a friend or relative makes a racist or homophobic remark, do you tend to confront them or let it slide? Are you more likely to confront them if it offends you directly or someone else who seems reluctant to speak up?

View 1599 Answers

Confront! confront! confront! Politely, but without equivocation.

repeat as necessary

2009-09-17T12:14:18Z

Panic is not helpful, panic is not helpful, panic is not...

downtime

2009-07-29T23:09:03Z

I've been pretty quiet lately; not posting here, or anywhere in any real depth. Even my facebook posts have been inane, judged by facebook standards! I'd love to claim that I've been involved in some complicated piece of magic, or some project of great importance that required my complete concentration-but I can't. (well, I could claim it, but it wouldn't be truthful). The simple fact is, that I hit a wall-sleep and exhaustion-wise.

All during the school year, I get up at 6am to see my daughter off to school, or to drive her to school when there are #^$*&( early in the morning band practices. She tells me I don't have to, but doing so, if only to say "have a good day" is one of my ways that I qualify to myself as a good mother. Depending on his work schedule, my husband gets home somewhere between 11pm and 1am, and I like to have dinner ready and waiting for him, to talk to him and help him de-stress and unwind from his day. It is one of my ways that I qualify to myself that I am a good spouse. And, as the economy has worsened and my business has taken hit after hit, I take comfort that at least I am good at those two roles.

There aren't enough hours between when I get into bed with my husband and when I get up to see our daughter off to school for me to get sufficient sleep. When my girls were younger and went to sleep-away camp, I would take one week while they were gone to fill my sleep bank, and that, plus the occasional sleeping late on a weekend, would get me through the year. Later, when they were too old for that, and were old enough to need to be driven places during the summer, my husband would try to schedule at least one week of his vacation for a school break. And I would take that week and sleep and fill my sleep bank.

This year, we visited his mother for that vacation, and I did not get a chance to fill the sleep bank. (I believe that was actually my last post, here on livejournal "busy not making home improvements.") At first, I couldn't tell all that much, that I had missed my week of catching up on sleep. But then, everything started to get difficult, especially emotional and cognitive issues. Writing because difficult because I couldn't track a thought from start to finish. Reading? I can manage childrens books. Memory? Um, what were we talking about?

DH (that's the spouse) has a week off, next week. I am hoping for at least a couple of days of unconsciousness. Deliberate unconsciousness, at any rate.

Because I love when my childrens skills exceed my own

2009-05-28T11:24:42Z

http://chibikoun.deviantart.com/

My daughter, at Anime Boston. She made everything except the gun in her hand.

update

2009-05-13T01:37:44Z

I actually got the rest of the tomato plants in the ground, today. Very artistically arranged around the pea vines. (I know that it reads as if it should be the reverse, but the peas were in the garden, first). Even with all the rain we had last week, I was very glad to use my husbands handmade from scratch rain barrel to water everything. AND, I got the rye bread baked. Food that neither came from the oven or the gardens, purchased and some of it cooked...so what if I had no paying clients today-money isn't everything, right?

garden chat

2009-05-12T13:02:15Z

Do you ever do anything now that you swore you would never do when you were younger? What is it?

View 504 Answers

I
(After 3 months of really having a hard time getting enough energy together...)
I've got most of the gardens in, except that I seem to have a traffic problem. I don't know whether I was really slow in getting the spring greens (peas, lettuce, spinach, bok choi) into the ground, or whether we had a late cold spring, and then sudden warmth or what. But none of those are ready for harvest and I have tomato plants that need to go in some of those spaces. Yesterday I planted 8 of the 12 tomatoes in the bed with the leafy greens-they won't mind the shade the tomatoes will make and by the time the tomato plants are really big, it will be too hot for the greens, anyway. Which will be good because I won't be able to get around the tomatoes to get to them. The other tomato plants will just have to be artisticly arranged amongst the pea vines in the other garden. I hope the peas grow tall enough, quickly enough to not get shaded out. There are 2 varieties of tomatoes-Brandywine pink, and Amish paste, both open pollinated, heirloom types, although I'm lazy and I buy the plants. We've been eating asparagus, and I've been harvesting and drying oregano, the rhubarb is ready, too. I've started the seeds for the cucumbers and the squash, but since they are true warm weather plants, I don't need to worry about space for them now. Later, I will go check on the mints, although in all honesty, nothing, or almost nothing will discourage the mint beds.

I also started some rye bread yesterday, after making the mistake of buying some in the supermarket. I can't believe the fluffy grey paste that is sold as rye bread! Started working on it yesterday, and it should be ready to have with dinner, tonight. And, it will taste right!

An attempt at relearning to communicate

2009-04-26T18:52:30Z

It has been a rough and learning year, and I haven't always felt chatty. The last month or so has really found me closed-mouthed, even as I was desiring of human interaction. So, in an effort to start talking again, I will relate a dream that I had, earlier this week. Although strange, it may not have much significance. On the other hand, I have noticed the re-occuring theme of oceans and rough ocean water...those who are not interested in reading the dreams of others, well, just feel free to skip this!

I am being carried, cradled in the arms of an older man. He is walking along the very edge of a narrow cement walkway. On the other edge of that walkway are cafe tables, full of people eating and drinking and generally having a good time. Far below us, is a rocky ocean beach, the water that cold atlantic ocean green and full of large, crashing waves. I am very nervous that the man carrying me is balancing and walking so close to the edge and won't move toward the middle of the walkway. Just before I say something to him, he overbalances and we both fall. Somehow, though, we both manage to grab the walkway by our fingertips. I pull myself up and then help him back up onto the ledge. As we sit catching our breath, I say to him, "That's why, when you curse, you should always direct the curse with a specific God, that way, you know who will respond, my favorite is 'Sweet Kali on a cracker."

I have no idea what any of that was about!

Busy Not Doing Home Improvements (alas!)

2009-04-11T19:54:09Z

In Florida, at my Mother-In-Laws. It is very hard to cook in someone elses kitchen. Also, I know I have a trained palate, but is it really posible for someone to eat butter with an expiration date of more than 2 years past, and NOT notice that the taste is "off?"

And what did we do today, dearie?

2009-04-07T22:06:13Z

http://jimbeausworld.blogspot.com/

For my Jewitchy Friends

2009-04-02T22:37:56Z

Although the rest of you might enjoy this, too!

http://9a4440c5.fb.joyent.us/haggadah/ultraModern2.php

Finally-some truly good news!

2009-04-01T21:37:10Z

My older daughter has gotten accepted into the Drexel University REU program for this summer! That means guarenteed housing (paid for by the program), transportation money, a nice sized stipend and actual research lab work, in a airconditioned laboratory!

formerlyfb @ 2009-03-26T18:52:00

2009-03-26T23:00:24Z

I hate the College Board and their website! 4 years of applications for financial aid (which, btw, you have to pay to apply for) and 4 years of dealing with their broken links and oops!. 4 years of giving them my tax returns, so they can collate the information and send it along to Columbia. 4 years of wondering how much of that info they hold onto. 4 years of estimating net worth (now that was a lot of fun, this year) 4 years and 1 daughter down, 4 years, and 1 daughter to go. It is entirely possible that I am looking forward to the end of dealing with the College Board even more than I am looking forward to my girls graduations. (Graduate school? They are on their own!)

Nightmare

2009-03-24T14:12:04Z

So, last night DH comes home from work seriously unhappy. His union contract is up April 1st, and unlike previous years, there has been no early settlement, or even early talks. The only word from the company is that it wants the right to have layoffs regardless of seniority. DH is 4 years from (non) early retirement. (he had applied for early retirement and had been denied)

Last night, I dreamed that the family was on a train platform, surrounded by luggage. We were going on vacation. All around us were other families, also on their ways to various trips and vacations. All of a sudden, the train platform was swarmed by law inforcement agents in various uniforms, telling us that we must evacuate the train platform immediately! So we did, making sure that we had our children with us, but leaving all of our luggage and bags. Eventually, we were allowed back onto the platform, walking between phalanxes of officers, who also lined the train platform. All of the luggage had been ransacked and all the valuables had been taken. All money, all jewelry, train tickets, hotel reservations-all gone. The officials just shrugged-it was nothing personal, just business.

Methinks that this is one dream that needs no deep thinking to interpret.

A few days late, but it is Spring!

2009-03-22T23:05:56Z

And, as I poke my head up after one of the darker end of winter seasons (2 deaths, a brand new health concern, general and society wide financial anxiety, etc, etc, etc), I look in on some of the internet magic discussion groups that I participate in and wonder: have those people lost their minds, or have I changed? I think that I am going to give many of those Yahoo groups a rest.

In any case, it is Spring, and I am glad. I haven't planted any of my flower seeds, yet, but the rhubarb has started to come up, and the asparagus beds are cleaned. The peas are planted. I am preparing for the next phase in the alchemy project, which will commence Tuesday at dawn. I got to watch bird sex the other day. (Robins can be really demonstrative, who'da thunk?)

The health concern? It appears that I may have (as the second opthamalogist put it) a teeny, baby, cataract. Strangely enough, this doesn't really bother me much. Not knowing why my vision was degrading so quickly in one eye, bothered me far more. Cataracts can be repaired. And now, I have the perfect explanation for my massive print jobs, both at home and at Staples-its not that I am unwilling to read large amounts of print on a computer screen (although I am unwilling!) I simply can't.

I should be thinking about a thorough Spring cleaning of the house, but I would much rather be outside. (You know your house needs dusting, when you look at your computer screen and say "where did the star screen saver come from?" and then realize it is dust)

Little by little life will return to normal-whatever that means!

time to change the picture

2009-03-12T23:46:28Z

The snow is all gone, and I am hoping that we are done with it for the season. I cleaned out the rhubarb bed today, just raked all the leaves and twigs and rabbit and deer poop off to the side. The fallen branches went onto the "one of these days we will get all of this chipped and shredded" pile. (also known as the place where the rabbits live). The very earliest tips of the new rhubarb are just beginning to poke out of the ground, I will see if I can get a picture tomorrow.

I walked around the circle today, both inside and out. All but one of the trees look good (the picture above is a couple of years old by now). One tree at the end looks a little beaten up. Not eaten (deer love arbor vitae), but as if a teeny-tiny buck had been rubbing his antlers on the trunk and had knocked some of the branches off and had rubbed the bark off the trunk. But what deer would be doing that 8 to 10 inches off the ground?

I need to get a newer non-snowy picture done.

getting there

2009-03-12T03:36:17Z

Little by little, life is returning to what passes for normal. I've pretty much stuck to Facebook for the last couple of weeks; throwing out a random sentence every now and then was far easier than actually stringing them together coherently. DH and I attended another funeral 2 days after my Grandmothers-that didn't help issues! But here, I've managed 4 sentences, in what I think is English, so the catching up can commence!

Sad

2009-02-26T14:13:02Z

My Grandmother died this morning. There is a lot that needs to be dealt with both emotionally and practically (the phone is ringing off the hook) . If I owe you email or attention, please understand that I'm not ignoring you.

Tuna Time

2009-02-26T01:24:01Z

I am such a softy of a furmom. I had to take Clio to the vet this morning. It was the first time she has left the house in 11 years, when we got her as a kitten from the local rescue. The claws on one paw weren't growing right, and had curved back into the pads of the paw, piercing them. Poor baby, she couldn't put any weight on that paw. She didn't cry on the way to the vet-she yelled. She yelled in the waiting room. She didn't yell, or swipe at the vet, though, she was too scared.The vet took her off, clipped those claws and cleaned the pads of that foot, since they were infected. Then, she was given an injection of antibiotic and given back to me, along with a bottle of antibiotic to give her. She yelled all the way home. When we got back to the house, I opened the cat carrier, and she leaped out and vanished. Eventually, I found her hiding under my daughters bed, angry and glowering at me. (the cat, not the bed)

I went and opened a can of tuna fish, not cat food, but tuna, packaged for two leggers. I put a bit on a saucer and put it near the bed. Clio came out just far enough to eat the tuna, and then she scooted back under the bed. A little while later, I put a bit more fish on the saucer and put it in the doorway to my daughters bedroom. Clio wouldn't come out while I stood there, but when I came back 2 minutes later, the saucer was clean. I went and got a bit more fish and brought it upstairs. Clio came out from under the bed and looked at the plate. I told her that she had to come downstairs for it, and took it back down, and put it near the bottom of the stairs. She came down and ate the fish. Finally, I put a bit more on the saucer and put the saucer next to her bowls of regular food and water, and she came over and ate the fish and drank some water. Then, she came over to me, purring. I had been forgiven. Phew!

Of course, one of the things the vet wants me to do is to soak that paw in warm water and epsom salts twice a day. Take a cats paw and put it in water???? Can you do a kitty pedicure without getting raked by the rest of her claws? I think that I will that to my daughter!

formerlyfb @ 2009-02-24T12:56:00

2009-02-24T17:57:38Z

Just shoot me.

Now.

Please.

Late Winter/Pre Spring Antsy-ness

2009-02-21T16:19:27Z

Doing inventory. So I have one child who is 21 and (excepting the tuition and dorm bills) more or less independant. I've got a 17 year old child who is starting the serious college and moving out research. I've got a husband who, although ill at the moment, doesn't look like he will be dying on me, or needing the hospital anytime in the forseeable future. I will say that the winter has been long-but they all are. I am suffering from serious restlessness and from the relentlessness of several decades of the job of making people happy. Don't get me wrong-I like making people happy-it really does feel good to me. But I am not happy at how far my interpersonal horizons have shrunk. When I worked at a gym, at least I saw a regular parade of people. Having my own businesss shrunk that parade, and the downward spiral of the economy has shrunk the number of people that I actually see, in the flesh, even further. I will change this. While I wouldn't go as far as to say that I am a touchy-feely kind of person (my inclination is not to hug and kiss, or even air kiss people I only know casually, for example), I am not satisfied with virtual relationships and virtual friendships. I know that I need real people. So what I am doing about this? Well, knowing that it sounds counter-intuitive, the first thing that I've done is stick my toes back into the social networking world of the internet. I've never done much IMing, but now I am trying to. I'm not looking to win the award for the most number of friends of Facebook, or whatever. I'm just looking for another venue or two to make connections which will lead (or not!) to actual face to face, in the flesh meetings. I've done this once, already, and am planning to meet another email/blogger very soon (pending agreement on childrens' school schedules). While neither of these people are local to me, neither do they require plane travel. It looks to be a satisfying first step.

formerlyfb @ 2009-02-19T19:52:00

2009-02-20T01:03:30Z

Visited my grandmother in the hospital today. At age 97, she decided to have elective surgery. The healing time has been slower than she anticipated, and she is very annoyed that her doctors won't release her to the rehab center. (she had a knee replaced, and since she lives in alone, in a house with stairs, and refuses a live-in aide in her home, her doctor made the live in rehab a requirement of doing the surgery). Its not that anything went wrong with the surgery, itself but at age 97, the stress of the surgery itself is harder for her body to deal with. Anyway, aside from being thoroughly bored, and hating the food, she seems fine. Oh, and she is very, very tired. Well, she is 97 and the hospital has a general announce system, rather than a beeper system for its staff. Its one of the noisiest, non-factory places I've ever been in! No wonder she is tired, its never quiet and dark, so how could she sleep? Oh, and she misses her dog terribly. Children and babies are allowed to visit, so she has gotten to see some of her great-grandchildren, but she really misses her dog. I told her "next life, do your elective surgery earlier!" She laughed, and agreed.

formerlyfb @ 2009-02-18T15:32:00

2009-02-18T20:36:23Z

Somehow, I've become the mother of a 21 year old.

I have no idea how that happened, since it seems to me that she was 3 years old, just yesterday.

Happy Birthday ScienceValkyre, may your path always be as clear to you as it seems now.
Much love,
Mommy